Sometimes things just get so complicated, frustrating, wrong, sick, chaotic... yeah you get the picture. You know those times when everything just seems to pile up at once and you just don't know what to do with yourself? What the heck are you supposed to do in the middle of that?
When my close friends ask how I'm doing I just tell them straight up what's going on with me.... but then I follow up with "But all you can do is keep dancing I guess." ...Right? I mean, there's PLENTY of reasons why my life is "dysfunctional" right now.... which I won't go into detail about all that.... no thanks to spilling my guts on the internet. But are you really supposed to keep dancing? Do you try to fix the dysfunction? CAN you fix the dysfunction? Or is the life of an authentic person always dysfunctional? The people that I know, who try to "fix" their dysfunction just seem, perfect. But perfection is unattractive to me. It seems... fake? It seems.. just like a whole lot of life is missed out on for the sake of having a perfect family, perfectly sheltered children, perfect friends, perfect parties, perfect hair...etc. And yes, I do know that everyone who seems "perfect" does have their issues... but are they correct in trying to run away from the natural, but unfortunate cycle of chaos, hardship and dysfunction?
I just feel like without the incredible sorrow and frustration that I go through, and can't seem to escape, my life would be dull. Because of those moments that last any where from a couple of minutes to months, the sparse wonderful and beautiful moments are all the more enjoyable.
I don't know where I"m going with this quite yet. I'm done for now.
